Well, well, well. Look who’s suddenly stopped clucking now the US trade deal has been agreed.
After years of Labour-induced hysteria over the idea that Brexit would see Britain force-fed chlorinated chicken and hormone-pumped Franken-beef, we now have the astonishing spectacle of Douglas Alexander, Labour’s own Trade Minister, calmly declaring:
“All the speculation in relation to chlorinated chicken and hormone injected beef has turned out to be unfounded.”
Speculation, Douglas? You might as well blame the weatherman for the hurricane YOU brewed.
This is the same Labour Party that practically weaponised poultry. Yes, they ran around like turbo-charged headless chickens, feathers flying, screeching that the Tories would turn the UK into a gastronomic dystopia ruled by American corporate cattle overlords. “Our roast dinners will be radioactive!” they basically cried, “Our children will grow feathers!” Oh, the drama. One would think Tesco was about to become a branch of Jurassic Park.
But now… now that the US trade deal has landed, there is zero mention mutant meat on the manifest. Labour is suddenly sipping herbal tea and murmuring “Nothing to see here. It was all a bit overblown.”
No, Douglas. The overblowing was the point. Labour didn’t just speculate, they orchestrated a fearmongering PR supernova. You could hardly move in the Commons without tripping over a Labour MP waving a raw chicken like some grim talisman of trade apocalypse when the Tories were in power. They once did the same with wallpaper and cake too I seem to remember.
Let’s be absolutely clear: the heavy lifting on the US trade deal was done by the Conservatives, long before Labour even got its boots under the table. Trade deals of this scale typically take around three to five years to negotiate, this one was no exception. And as for the infamous chlorinated chicken? You’d get a bigger dose of chlorine from a casual swim at your local leisure centre than from eating a whole chicken.
Yet, Labour, when in opposition tried to gaslight an entire nation into thinking it was on the brink of beefgeddon and now wants us to simply forget. To swipe left on their entire chicken-little routine.
Sorry. That’s not how memory works. Not even in politics. Same goes for you lefty media!
This is about integrity. You don’t get to light the fire, fan the flames, then stroll back in with a fire extinguisher claiming to be the hero.
Britain deserves better than this short-circuiting, mood-swing approach to facts. We’ve got fusion reactors to manufacture, private British made rockets to make, and AI models doing surgery, and yet as always Labour thinks it’s clever to block the sun and peddle panic when the mood suits them.
Time to grow up, Labour. Own the mess, stop the retrospective mooing, and quit gaslighting the very voters you once whipped into a food-frenzied frenzy. The British public isn’t daft, and they’re certainly not buying what you’re flogging.
The polls are already telling the story. Keep this up, and 2029 won’t be a general election… it’ll be your last squawk at the ballot box.
By Claire Bullivant
I am sure that without the Tory party brexit would have died in a second referendum